Transcript Follies update

After a pleasant phone conversation, the nice folks at my undergraduate Alma Mater were pleased to send course descriptions of my long-ago adventures in English, Speech, and Government to Advisor Two. I awaited with bated breath the waiving of those three classes. Little did I know what was in store.

Eventually, I was forwarded an email of explanation from the person who had evaluated my transcripts in the first place. The writer seemed very defensive, saying that, in their experience, anything that had "workshop" in the title wasn't a real English class. Really? Two semesters, three hours per semester, it had "Honors" in the title, but it wasn't a real English class? Okay, how's about you explain this oversight, then, Transcript Evaluator Person: I got a "B" in Legal Writing. From a real, honest-to-deity, ABA-accredited Law School. That doesn't count, either? You going to tell me it's not on a par with the "English for Mouth Breathers" class you want to force me to take?

Moving on to Government: the course was described as being "for education majors, so it couldn't possibly be a match" for Hoth's government class. Again: Really? I can't believe the content was all that different. (Unless I missed the class in which it was revealed that the half-reptilian-alien Illuminati were truly in charge.) And could someone tell me why, exactly, the Government class isn't waived for Paralegal students? How much more about the American government does, say, a Food Service major know after that class than a Paralegal student does after taking "Introduction to Law?"

The email didn't really address why the Speech class was unacceptable. I guess the fertilizer truck didn't deliver a full load that day.

Yes, I'm annoyed. Peeved. Ticked off. The University of Southern North Dakota at Hoople's School of Library Science and Dewey Decimation deemed my undergraduate record worthy of granting me admittance into a Master's Degree program. The Western California State School of Law at Swami's Point thought my five year trip through the halls of Academia was a good enough foundation to build on. But Harvard On The freakin' Highway COMMUNITY COLLEGE says, "Nope. Our classes are too special for you not to take them. We will accept no imitations."

Give. Me. A. Break.